Throwback Thursday: What Brings Me Down

It’s day four of The 8th Annual Diabetes Blog Week. Today’s post is about the emotional side of living with, or caring for someone with, diabetes. I’ve had diabetes for 21 years, and during that time several people in my family have been diagnosed. It can be very emotional at times, especially when my sugar is high or low. When my sugar is high I’m irritated and short tempered, when it is low I want to cry. I also have a hard time concentrating and I see little blue spots when I’m low. Those are my first clues that my sugar is dropping. If I’m awake I can usually catch it before the shakes, and cold sweating starts.

Then there is the mental side of dealing with diabetes. When I was diagnosed, I never stopped to think about how my life would change. It wasn’t until later that I realized how much work goes into dealing with diabetes everyday. Pricking my fingers, multiple injections, counting carbs, analyzing the numbers, blaming myself when the numbers come out “bad”, weight gain, etc. It can all be overwhelming at times. What I keep telling myself is that I am doing the best that I can (negative self talk has no room in my head space when it comes to my diabetes). Sometimes the numbers are weird even if I do everything “right”, sometimes I just don’t feel like working with diabetes. Both are okay for me. I have learned to give myself grace and mercy.

As I mentioned earlier, I have several people in my family who have diabetes. At one point I was the care taker for two of them. I kept a meticulous log of their blood sugars, insulin intake, and doctor visits. I kept better records for them than I did for myself. Ha! Both people had multiple other medical issues, so I knew how crucial it was for each doctor to have detailed information. Yes, it was time consuming and exhausting but it was necessary. It saved a lot of time and kept confusion to a minimum when medicine had to be changed.

This journey ain’t easy, but not many things in life are. I’ve learned to take it one day at a time and when that gets to big, I step back and take it moment by moment. I hope you will do the same. Be kind to yourself!

Sending you positive vibes, love and light!

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8 thoughts on “Throwback Thursday: What Brings Me Down

  1. I’m currently going through the pre-diabetic phase. If I don’t improve, then I’ll turn into a full diabetic at 24 😣 It’s definitely hard to maintain your weight while not worrying about numbers and medications. I’m praying for you and your journey! You’re an inspiration to talk about this openly.

    Liked by 1 person

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